Good morning and welcome in everybody. Today, we are going to take a look at a passage of scripture, but before we do that, I wanted to tell you a little story.
Sometimes people will try to train a dog to obey their commands. After all, they want them to be obedient to whatever they tell them to do. But a lot of the time, an animal has a complete lack of understanding, and they are utterly confused at certain instructions that are given by their owner. Rather than being patient with them by repetitively showing them what they need to do, people will quickly punish the animal instead, by beating them over and over again. When they continue to do this, they will eventually provoke the dog to anger, and with great vengeance it will get so ticked off that it will spin around and attack their owner!
This reminds me of the Christian Life.
We should never confuse a lack of understanding for willful disobedience. A policeman might forcefully yank somebody out of their car, but the entire time the person had absolutely no idea what offense that they had committed. A husband might snap at his wife when he gets home from work, but she never really understood what she had done to upset him. Don’t get me wrong, direct and willful disobedience always requires intervention, but a person must first understand that what they are doing is wrong. A dad should never be quick to wrath, but be patient, because you never want to get a child to the point where they explode on you, simply because they didn’t understand your instructions.
Colossians 3:21 (KJB) Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.
A lot of young children really want to please their dad, but in order to obey him, they need to understand his commands. This means that dads need to gently communicate with their families so they can at least make the attempt to do the things that please you. Many young people will grow up and take on the attributes of their dad. If he had a short temper with you, then you will have a short temper with your children. If he was constantly yelling at you, then you are constantly yelling at your family. If you truly care about your own kids, you teally don’t want to treat them in the same manner that your dad treated you. This is why men need to come to Christ Jesus, because we need to take on the attributes of our precious Lord, rather than following after the faults and shortcomings of your own dad.
We need to train up children as obedient servants of Christ Jesus, but God does not want you to stir up your children to a point of wrath. After all, they may sincerely be trying to do what you want, but they really don’t understand what you want them to do! There is only so much that people can take, and because of their frustration and inability to please you, they will finally explode. I’ve worked with a lot of young people during my life, and some of them were quick learners while others were extremely slow. I would categorize myself as a person who is an extremely slow learner in certain areas, because it took me longer to figure things out than others who were very bright. Some of the students I worked with had great struggles in school, and I watched many of them get pushed so hard that they finally unloaded on the teacher. So as a dad raising up your children, you have to remember to teach them well, and to educate them to strive to do what is right, but if the parent is over demanding of them, it can really be upsetting to the child. During those times, it’s good to take a break and deescalate the situation. Another point is that some dads can be overly severe and strict with their children, while the next one is overly permissive of willful disobedience. But like everything else in the Christian Life, moderation must be exercised when disciplining children.
Once again, you might give a child a command, but if they really don’t understand what you meant, rather than getting upset with them, you need to explain it a little better. This requires patience, something that most of the world lacks! Many times in order for someone to do the things that you want, you will first have to show them how to do what you want. I’m not really a mechanic, so if a mechanic told me to grab some type of tool from the tool chest, I really wouldn’t understand what they meant. They might yell and scream at me but that’s not going to change anything because I don’t understand what they want me to do. Once they show me a half inch combination wrench, then the next time they ask for it I can immediately go find it for them! That is called teaching, which is a quality that a lot of men don’t have time for. In order to have Spiritual fruit until life eternal, you will have to possess these qualities.
Whenever you teach others something, it will require patiently guiding the learner by hand until they understand what they have to do to complete the task. I like to really understand what God is saying in the scriptures, but it takes more than just looking at a verse or two. This is why my studies might be longer, but it is for the reason of getting a good grasp on the entirety of what God is teaching me. Someone can take one little command in scripture completely out of context and not really understand it at all because they don’t want to take the time to understand it further. Somebody might tell others about passages of scripture, but if you don’t thoroughly explain it to them, they might not understand it at all. Then what happens is the devil will steal away the seed that you have planted in their heart. When you don’t understand something, you cannot please God or others.
Communication is very important, not only out in society but within the family unit. Many times I’ve learned that you have to expect that when you command someone to do something, they are not going to understand what you are saying until you expound on it further. After all, this is what Jesus did with His own disciples. They wanted to have a deeper understanding of the faith, so he would use parables or illustrations to help them to have a better grasp of Spiritual things.
Like I already said, a lot of children want to please their dad, but sometimes.they can’t get to that point, simply because their dad assumes that they understood what he told them to do. With all the students I’ve worked with in my life, that is not always the case. At times I could say a short command to one of them, and they would go and take care of the matter quickly, but at other times they would give me a confused look, and it would take me five more minutes to gently explain the task at hand. After they finally got a grip on what I meant, then they went and did it, and came back smiling! Patience, patience, patience!
Even our precious Lord wanted to make sure that His disciples understood what He was saying. He would ask them if they understood, and if they did they would say, yea Lord. How many parents actually do that with their own children? Give them a command and then say do you understand what I’m saying? I bet you if they did, most of the kids would sheepishly say, no I don’t. That means that you have to explain it to them further so they know what they need to do. That’s the responsibility of a patient and loving dad.
Like I’ve always said, there is a time for rebukes and for punishment, especially if you know for a fact that the child is purposely rebelling against you. That’s a whole different situation. But you don’t want to be responsible to stir them up to anger simply because they did not understand what you wanted them to do. Yelling at children or even a wife does not always mean that they are going to do what you want them to do. You must thoroughly communicate what you want, so they can lovingly complete the task at hand. After all, this is the same way that God treats us when we seek wisdom from Him. The beloved Apostle James teaches us that if you seek wisdom, God is not going to upbraid you for doing so. This means that when you approach Him and say I don’t get it, He’s not going to scold you, but rather, take the time to make sure that you fully understand it. If God does that towards us, then a dad should certainly do that towards his own family. We should never allow children to be so fearful of punishment that they are afraid to say, what do you mean, or can you explain it better to me? If they cannot do that and approach you in that manner, then they can become quickly discouraged.
Again, there is a place for rebukes and being strict with your children when it is appropriate, but there is also a place for patient compassion when they simply don’t understand what you want. We must show moderation between the two characteristics. Our God is a God of severity, because He loves us severely, but He will also punish willful disobedience severely. But never confuse disobedience with a child who really doesn’t understand what you are saying. Take the time to communicate with them completely. Slow down with them and don’t be in a rush. If you become overly critical with them when they simply don’t get what you are saying, then you will only provoke them to wrath. You never want to do this, because it will only produce the same results, as,……
…..Beating the Dog
Let’s think about these things for right now. We can be found on your web browser by searching, tlkjbc where you can find our diaries distributed through various platforms. We are not associated, nor affiliated with any other religious groups. You can get our entire podcast feeds directly, along with transcripts at tlkjbc.com or I suppose that you could find us somewhere up here, in the Great Northern Minnesota woods. Peace to you all, and Lord willing, we will talk with you some more tomorrow. Till then, bye bye everybody.
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